• Rent-A-Hitman

    I wonder what I could do to make my wife want to have me killed. I could ask her I guess but I’d hate to find out I had already driven her to murder, and she just hadn’t wound up the courage to pull the trigger yet. She had a Snapped obsession for a little…

  • You’ll Never Take Me Alive! Yeah, We Will.

    I know I’ve written about car thieves before, but I really liked watching this guy somersault fifty feet off a bridge. These are old sayings and kind of played out but: “Go big or go home.” or “If your gonna do it wrong, do it right.” or “You’ll never catch me, copper!” All seem to…

  • Tweakers and their Vibrators

    In Adelaide, Australia, four people got locked up for kidnap and torture. And it all started with the theft of a sex toy. This quote from the article is priceless: “The court heard the incident began when Janise (name redacted to protect the moronic) who was an ice user, wanted revenge on the victim after…

  • Here Kitty Kitty

    I think it’s important to start off by saying this didn’t happen in Florida. Wisconsin either has really cool cat toys or is in serious need of some gun safety training. A 19-year-old named Jashanti (common spelling) in Kenosha, Wisconsin decided to use the laser sight fixed to the frame of a 9mm handgun as…

  • Naked on a Golf Cart

    A naked woman drove a golf cart into the middle of a standoff between police and an armed teenager. The teenager was apparently holding himself hostage on the roof of his home around midnight on September 6th (Happy Labor Day!) when Jessica Smith, 28, refused orders to leave the area and found her bare ass…

Blog at WordPress.com.